Thursday, 6 April 2017

Do you want a successful marriage life? Avoid these 5 pitfalls

Editor's note: Kingsley Iwu, the NAIJ.com partner blogger, in this article, explains five things that could easily destroy people’s marriages and how to avert them.

Kingsley is a good writer, who writes about the wisdom of life. He could be contacted via: http://ift.tt/2m6IZH4 or iwukingsley70@gmail.com.

More details in NAIJ.com’s step-by-step guide for guest bloggers.

One of the most important secrets about a successful marriage is the level of healthy relationship between partners. There are marriages without relationship at all; the partners only live a cat and dog life. They could not even understand one another.

Do you want a successful marriage life? Avoid these 5 pitfalls

A happily married couple

Let’s see things that cause harm in a marriage:

1. Concentrating on flaws

There is no where you will find a perfect marriage. If you are always emphasising on the flaws in your relationship, you will soon get stuck with it.

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Everything that's going bad can be corrected, if you are willing to understand that in life, you must face imperfections. I think, you need to always spend more time thinking about what would work in your marriage or relationship, instead of complaining about the flaws.

There is not a perfect one out there, what makes you think they are is because, the couple you would think to be perfect focuses on what works for them.

2. Feeling superior

This particular issue have and is destroying many marriages and relationships. This is indeed an issue to look upon.

Many partners looks down on the other for one reason or so. Everyone wants to be given some level of respect. Some people do that to their partner because they feel they are less inferior and less important, so they act that way to show themselves worthy to be respected.

Making your spouse look like a queen or king will really go a long way in sustaining the relationship.

3. Turning down conversations

I know some men that complained to me about how boring their wives can be. Conversation is one of the driving force of any relationship. Effective communication is the key to good conversation. This particular vacuum can push a partner outside, maybe not to cheat, but can lead to cheating.

What i mean is this: If a particular partner is not always getting good conversation at home, he/she will certainly prefer to stay out more and this can lead to cheating. Because, he/she is getting better communication with another person other than you. Except a spouse that has the fear of God.

4. Never admit your wrongs

They are partners who don't admit 'their bad' when they are wrong. They are always defensive and attacking. If your partner tells you something you did wrong or some habits in you that's not going well with him/her, i think you really need to look inwardly first.

Do you want a successful marriage life? Avoid these 5 pitfalls

A nagging couple

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If you are always proving to be right, you are really sending a wrong message and it will always cause arguments. Nothing destroys marriage faster than persistent argument.

5. Being Judgmental

Judging your partner always is telling them that you are not comfortable with their personality. Even at that, you can be passing a message that you made a mistake having him/her as a partner.

When you do this for a long time, it will cause more than what you least expected, in fact, it can damage the marriage. Instead of sounding judgmental, discuss it with your partner in a calm way.

The views expressed in this article are the author’s own and do not necessarily represent the editorial policy of NAIJ.com. NAIJ.com welcomes writers, bloggers, photographers and all sorts of “noise makers” to become a part of our Bloggers network.

If you are a seasoned writer or a complete newbie – apply and become Nigeria’s next star blogger. Send us some info about your career, interests and expertise and why you’d like to contribute to the Blogger Network at blogger@corp.naij.com Also, please send us the link to your blog and three examples of your work.

More details in NAIJ.com’s step-by-step guide for guest bloggers.

In this NAIJ.com video, a former CBN governor and Emir of Kano Sanusi Lamido blasts Nigerian leadership.



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